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Online Dating Adventures

“I beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called.”
the beginning of Ephesians 4

In the quest for a spouse, everyone from my friends to strangers to siblings to parents have told me that I should do online dating. A way to meet more people, expand my reach. I paid for an entire year's subscription and didn't have any bites - only one guy, who was pretty prejudice even progressed to an in-person meeting. Today as I was looking around my archived draft posts, I found this gem. The below is the real struggle of online dating. Maybe this was just the pool from Catholic Match, but I think it's a good representation of the weird things you see online. The advantage of online dating is that you can just copy & paste this crazy into a blog post as evidence. I'm not sure what my future spouse will look like or be like - but I think comments and profiles like this are off my list. Hopefully it doesn't make me too picky.

Let's call this one 'Rick' - well cause that's his name and he seems a little odd:
Fortunately, I'm not full of myself, and I'llhus try to take very good care of you. I want to be your charming prince. My profile photo is dated. I've lost a little hair since then. Otherwise, it basically looks like me. I try hard to make people feel special without spoiling them. People who have known me would probably agree that I do a good job at that. You needn't contact me. Be assured that I'm looking for you. If you look at my profile, that will be enough. Please don't be discouraged if I don't respond immediately. 
 and ...
Must be willing to consider having an in-house night nurse to tend to the children in the middle of the night so you can be well rested during the day. 
then ...
One of my goals in life is to buy my wife what I call a princess dress - a dress with 'exploded' shoulders and a broad, long bottom half. It isn't very high on my lists of priorities, but it is a goal. 
it's not over ...
I can see traveling a bit. Since I am specifically not enchanted by the hierarchy, the Pope, or the Vatican, I have no burning interest in going to Rome. That doesn't mean I would mind taking you on a trip, though.
Another gem from Nicholas, not Nick ...
Therefore it is for the sake of the children that I have boiled down the most important traits for an ideal match. I call them, "The Three C's." An ideal match should be Catholic, Conservative, and Chiropractically-minded. I don't want to have a house that's divided by religion, politics, or healthcare. Also, to be fair, you would probably not want to get into a lot of arguments all the time as well. I was raised my entire life under chiropractic care. It has kept me healthy all these years, with medicine only being employed on an emergency basis. I realize not everyone is familiar with chiropractic care, and I would be glad to answer any questions about it, but that is how I would intend to raise the children.
for his credit, he does continue to explain himself ...
 As stated above, I am a Doctor of Chiropractic, commonly known as a chiropractor. I prefer the title, "friendly neighborhood nervous system facilitator." It is my ideal job. Before I finally was led to my vocation as a chiropractor, I did not know what I wanted to be. All I knew was that I wanted a job that I liked, could support me and a family, and also helped people directly. When God finally revealed to me that this was the path I should take, it amazed me that I did not realize it sooner. Sure enough, I now have my three criteria.
Back to the old-fashioned way to meeting men - mutual acquaintances, fellow Church attendees, local establishments... With Online Dating, at least you get to the crazy pretty quickly!

Comments

  1. This gave me a good chuckle this morning, Katie- thank you! I did online dating for the majority of 10 years. 10 YEARS! The stories I could tell - some similar to yours. I finally signed off about 3 years ago and haven't gone back (I consider it in the wee small hours of the morning, but ultimately decide against it) in all of those years do you know how many actual dates I went on? 1. One single date where a boy met me in person. (He brought me a red rose and everything, but I realized he had lied on most of his profile and insisted on keeping the conversation centered on how much he worked out) The rest non-wacky ones were talkative, up for exchanging numbers and would text, but as soon as any talk of actually meeting in person came up- radio silence. I tried all of the services- eHarmony actually ran out of matches for me after 3 weeks. It was interesting how many of my matches and I had mutual friends. A face would look familiar or I'd mention where I went to school or where I worked and we'd realize we knew the same people- even those matches didn't want to meet me. So like you- I've been sticking with the old-fashioned way. Most recently 2 of my students and their younger brother who is still in high school (who I never thought paid that much attention to me) thought I'd be perfect for one of their high school teachers. I find him on Facebook, send a friend request and a private message explaining that no, he didn't know me (we did have 3 friends in common, though) but that some of his former students suggested that I say hello. He actually figured out the connection, questioned the younger sibling, but still didn't accept my request or respond to my message. It has now been 3 months since I sent that message. I revoked the request and sent a, "sorry to bother you" message. He still didn't answer, but was obviously on FB. It was disappointing, but par for the course in my experience. I don't know what the secret formula is, I wish I did, but for now I'm trying not to dwell on it- it would drive me crazy for sure. So just know that you're not alone!

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    Replies
    1. Laura - so GREAT to hear from you! Miss you lots :) Glad to know it's not just me. Someone brought up the Online thing again to me yesterday and asked if I tried those Catholic sites - I was like "yeah, they're awful" - then she tells me about someone who knows who was on it for years and met someone after 4 or 5 years who she's now married to. Okay, I'm not saying it doesn't work - but I do think it keeps everything online and easy to just talk about whatever you feel like even if it's not the whole truth about yourself. Just because we have any chemistry via email/test (which isn't hard to make happen) doesn't mean he can hold a conversation - and in the end, I want to be able to talk with my husband, not send emails all the live long day!

      Regarding the Facebook thing - what gives? Like, what did he see on your FB profile that made him say "not worth a response - not even a 'I'm just not interested at this time'"? Not the kind of man who's ready for a relationship, that's for sure! Us single gals have got to stick together! I'll keep my eyes peeled for you ... no promises though, unfortunately...

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  2. Miss you too- it has been a long time! I'm not sure- maybe my picture with Superman was too intimidating? Who knows. I like your latest post, too- supprt that library! :) Take care!

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