I have a tendency to over-analyze things - which if you know me in real life you would never think! So over the last 18 months of being present in the online dating circle, I'm giving it up. I've also spend the last few weeks reading the beginning of this book by Aziz Ansari (it was only $3.99 so I splurged). He and this other guy Eric did a lot of research about Modern Romance and are bringing it back to the people.
The book puts in writing a lot of the things I'm experiencing in this crazy world as a 30 year old single gal trying to find herself a mate. I don't even think I'm fully immersed in to the online dating culture. For instance, none of this is happening. I don't pursue the men following Cindy's advice here - and also it not being fruitful after a few messages. I did take a leap (because I couldn't get this song out of my mind) on one guy and spent a few weeks chatting online and on the phone before an in person meeting that solidified how much I didn't ever want to talk with him again.
Another guy viewed my profile and had a little quiz in his that lead to his name and a 'find me on Facebook' hint - which I did and spent time crafting this great message to initiate a conversation in the hopes that he would respond. I was interested in what he wrote about himself and wanted to know more. Know what I got? ... ... ... You guessed it, a big fat nothing! No response at all.
All this does is confirm my extreme dislike of the whole online thing. I've always said "I don't want that to be my story" - I got over it. Meeting online isn't a bad story. It's not the first thing that people say - it won't be what we tell our grand-kids - unless this is the 'how' of our meeting.
"Grandma, how'd you and grandpa meet?" asked the cutest grand-kid ever.
"Well, you see. It was a long time ago in another era. He logged in to this online world where he could scroll through hundreds of different women that a computer matched him up with and view their carefully selected profile. He wasn't committed to the process enough to pay for the service, so he could only send Emotigrams to girls who's profile he liked. And one night he sent 20 of them, and I was one of them. (p.s. the first time we talked on the phone he told me that I wasn't the only girl he was interested in that night (p.p.s. yes a man who I talked to online said that to me the first time we talked on the phone)) So I decided I would send him a real message back and I crafted words so carefully it took me three days to even 'wink' back. Then for weeks and weeks we sent 'hello's and 'shocks' and 'welcome aboards' before he finally asked for my number to call me. Then three weeks later he called and we talked. Then we sent Facebook messages. Then he decided we should meet and 4 years later we got married. Now we live happily ever after."
In case you've never seen them, actual emoticons:
|Shocked at what? (no one's ever sent this to me, thank God!)|
|"Welcome Aboard" - what? The SS Lollipop?|
Are we sailors now? WHO says this??